NSFW Author

Jill did that next morning her first commute to work from my house. It should have been something natural compared to everything else we did, but there was a eerie impression I couldn’t shake when I was leaving our driveway.

Commuting, I learned from experience, is probably the most routinely boring experience of your life. You drive through the same streets and meet the same cars every day for the rest of your current life. It’s boring, it feels useless and traffic prolongs it’s duration while increasing the stress.

I was used to commute with Jill from our apartment but the morning commute from my house was something I had always done alone. It was something so tied to my old life with Suzy that I felt unease at having the beautiful young girl next to me.

Having a threesome in my old bedroom seemed natural. Kissing my wife in front of Jill and then watching both woman kiss passionately had all seem natural.

But driving with Jill felt odd. It seemed like I had weird values.

I still used to enjoy my morning drive because I could think alone if I needed to, listen to the news if I wanted to or simply tune to a music channel if I preferred it.

Having Jill in the car meant talking, usually about work. I can’t say I mind that much since it saves us time once we are in the office, but it meant losing that introspective period of time.

This morning however, Jill wasn’t talking about work. She was talking about Suzy and our living arrangement. At first, I was at odd of touching the subject without Suzy around but I realized that while Suzy and I had shared the night together, Jill had been alone with her thoughts probably longing for companionship after our blissful night.

So I listened to her, making sure to hear her concerns, her dreams, her thoughts about our couple, about our triplet, about the fact that she loves Suzy even if she isn’t sure that Suzy can love her back. About being torn between longing for more of a physical relationship with her while desiring to respect her limits.

I didn’t say much, I mostly just listened to her and added some supporting comments showing I cared about her.

The good news however, is that once we were at the office, Jill was happy to have been able to share her emotions and felt closer to me, while allowing us to concentrate on our duties.

We both had a very productive morning and when we were about to break for lunch, Suzy entered our office. Both of us jumped to our feet clearly showing joy at her arrival.

This prompted my wife to smile and show us that she had brought lunch for the three of us.

We proceeded to our little cafeteria where Jill prepared the plates and utensils and Suzy prepared the food. Feeling useless, I took care of the drinks.

Suzy had brought grated macaroni and a Ceasar salad. The pasta was already warmed up and only need serving but a little preparation was left to be done in the salad.

We sat down at the table and I realized that Suzy wasn’t simply here for our company. Her demeanour clearly showed she had something on her mind but she was keeping it to herself for the moment.

Once we finished eating Suzy looked nervous enough for Jill to notice despite barely knowing the woman.

“Honey, why are we back to condoms ?”, she asked without really looking anyone in the eyes.

I hesitated for a few seconds for an articulate answer and replied :

“Because the circle of monogamy was broken. When we parted, we no longer had sexual activity and as such either of us could have gotten STDs. Jill and I didn’t date long enough to build our own trust in that matter, so we only used condoms”.

“But that’s the thing”, Suzy added. “I didn’t have any other sexual partners. All your relations were protected by a condom. You and I could have sex again without one and if Jill gets tested, you could too”

“It’s not that simple Suzy. We could need to get tested to for Jill’s sake. She doesn’t know if we didn’t have STDs before. And we need another form of contraceptive to protect against pregnancy”

“I am back on the pill. I waited for it to be effective before telling you, but right now, I am no longer fertile”

Jill had a reaction so I asked her what was the problem.

“I have no intention of taking the pill long term. That stuff is scary. I don’t mind if you two don’t use a condom but we’ll need something else for me. Sorry.”

Suzy looked intensively at a younger girl and an awkward silence installed itself.

“Jill, sorry to pry in your life but this is something we’ll need to tackle one day or another. Do you want kids. Specifically, do you want kids with our boyfriend.”

“Not at all. Never. Sorry, I don’t want to reject your own kids who are wonderful, but I am not mother material. You could say I was almost neglected as a child and I don’t think I have what it takes. When I was younger, I vowed not to create additional miserable people on this planet. Don’t judge me please, it’s not that I am egoist, it’s that I realize that having kids of my own would mean revisiting my own awful childhood. If my only contribution to the next generation is helping you raise your kids, I will have done more than I thought possible.”

I didn’t know if I was I sad for her or sad that I wouldn’t have kids with her, but I felt sad as her declaration. I knew that Suzy didn’t want more children and I certainly didn’t want more from her. But I never thought about making kids with Jill.

Suzy broke the silence by asking me roughly the same question. “Would you ever want more kids ?”

“The only reason I would want more kids would be if Jill wanted more. I don’t think it would be fair to ask her to renounce to being a mother. But if she doesn’t want to, I am perfectly happy with our kids.”

I took Jill’s hand over the table. Suzy extended her won and I took it with my other hand. A few second later, Jill and Suzy were also holding their hand forming a triangle.

So Suzy suggested : “Why not get a vasectomy then ?”

I thought about it in silence and realized that both of my girlfriends were hanging to my lips, hoping for an answer. “Sure, let’s do it.”

Suzy explained she didn’t have a client in the afternoon and Jill and I decided to take the time off too.

We picked a clinic close by and each of us were tested for STDs. I also took and appointment with a urologist for the next Wednesday which, coincidently, is also the day we should get our results.